Don ts of dating
Follow Emma Tessler, Jordan Carlos, Matthew Hussey, and Marina Khidekel on Twitter.
Last month we revisited the Solo-ish archives and highlighted nine tips to boost your online-dating game.
All us guys can get out sometimes is 'Hey.' We're just trying. Then she immediately becomes unique." —Matthew Hussey"So many women go into a date thinking, 'What do I think of this person? You start picking him apart, like, 'I don't like his shoes,' or, 'He's nice but I wish he had more hair.' But a friend of mine actually gave the best advice about this.
Instead of focusing on what you think of your date superficially, focus on 'How does he or she make me feel? Does she make me feel like the best version of myself?
It's extraordinarily rare that a woman actually makes our job easier. If you continue the conversation, you'll never know if he's actually attracted or just going with the flow. I'm not saying it's an excuse, but sometimes that is the case." —Jordan Carlos"Being good at writing an online profile only means that you're good at writing an online profile. A lot of great people suck at writing online-dating profiles and taking pictures. So date everyone." —Emma Tessler"Go someplace you feel comfortable. I would always go stake out a spot and get there early.
Once you go with its rhythms, you're a lot better off." —Jordan Carlos, comedian, writer for Comedy Central's "If you want to meet a better quality man, you're going to have to get used to taking more risks. We want you to turn to us and be like, 'It's so busy in here.' Say the most obvious thing you can think of because in that moment, we don't hear, 'It's so busy in here.' We hear, 'It's OK for you to talk to me.'" —Matthew Hussey, dating coach, "The best thing you can do is engage a guy for a moment — mention his shoes, his style, his anything — and then turn away. It's a very specific skill, and it's pretty useless in the rest of the world.
If you’ve met a nice, sincere guy, and you’re having a good time dating him, don’t fly to your computer the second you get home to flirt with a dozen new seductive suitors.
On the Internet, it’s easy to get distracted by the smorgasbord of smooth-talking guys only to lose sight of the one who just might be Mr.
Arrange to meet him in a public place for the first couple of dates.
In a phone chat, you’ll get a better sense of whether your personalities click. Note: it’s a bad sign if, during his monologue about his golf swing, you’re checking your watch and praying that you lose your signal.
DON’T disclose where you live or for that matter, any personal information that could lead to your address, such as your home phone number, last name, or an email address that includes your last name.
In the flesh, he could have passed for Dracula, with a mouthful of rotted, brown, pointy fangs. Remember, real men lose their hair and grow love handles, yet if you met them in person, you just might find them charming.
Besides, if you’re anything like us, you probably don’t look that much like Angelina.
Unless you work in a totally male milieu—for instance, a urologists’s office, NASCAR race track, or beef ‘n’ ale house—your quest to meet a man will take you to the Internet.